Mr. President--Obamala: CLONE Elizabeth Warren!

Obamala with 'Sage' on Air Force One

I’m on Air Force One with Obamala—what a Macher I am!  I received an invitation to meet with the President last week. That’s good because I didn’t want to show up unannounced; my manners are impeccable.

Obamala is a big fan of my blog; most surprising, he loves Yiddish—who knew!   Let me tell you—Air Force One is no United Economy flight; such leg room, I’ve never seen—a michaya!

Obamala and I drink tea and nosh on potato knishes; I ask the President questions about his family and life on 1600 Pennsylvania Ave—that’s his address— I hope he doesn’t mind that I am sharing it with all of you.  

“Sir how’s the Mishpocheh,” I ask?  Michelle, Malia and Sashala are fine, he tells me.  “Mr. Obamala, President, Sir….Mrs. Potus is so gorgeous; those shamttehs she wears—Oy—they must cost a fortune; she always looks like a million bucks!” The President thanks me for my kind words and sips his tea. 

“So how is life at the White House Sir?”  “Sage, it’s like living in a fish bowl,” he responds.  “A fish bowl—huh—is that like living in a shtetl, I ask?”  He smiles, sips his tea and doesn’t answer.  “Is there a pattern here,” I wonder?

The conversation shifts to his administration; “Mr. President, can we talk-- really talk, I ask?”  “Sure Sage,” he answers with enthusiasm. 

“Mr. President—Obamala, I am thrilled with the appointment of Elizabeth Warren to oversee the creation of the Consumer Agency; a bigger mensch, you couldn’t appoint.  She actually likes Americans more than banks and credit card companies—can you imagine that Sir?  In fact, I think we need a lot more Elizabeth Warrens in your administration.

The President smiles broadly, and I continue.  “Sir, I have a suggestion:  CLONE Elizabeth Warren; that’s right—clone her; you could get rid of Geithner, Summers, Rahm, Gibbs, Gates, Salazar and the others; they’re soooo 2009! She could replace them.  No problem.”

The President looks skeptical, but always a gentleman, he thanks me. “One more suggestion,” he gestures me to continue.  “Please do me a favor, forget compromising with the Republicans and the Doggie Democrats; they’re no-goodniks; Americans need them like a loch-in-kop.”   

“If you want support from your base, act on your promises from 2008.”  

Thrilled with my rhyme, I don’t wait for Obamala to respond; instead, I thank the President for a lovely meeting and the delicious knishes—they were to die for!

Next, I prepare for a meeting with Elizabeth Warren—we have so much to discuss!

Glossary

Yiddish/Yid-English                                        English
-Macher                                                           -Big Shot
-Mensch                                                           -A special person
-Michaya                                                          -A pleasurable experience

-Nosh                                                               -Snack
-Mishpocheh                                                    -Family

-Shmattehs                                                       -Rags or clothes
-Shtetl                                                              -Small village populated by Jews
-Luch-in-kop                                                   -Hole-in-the-head

References
Mrs. Potus is Michele Obama
Doggy Democrat is a Blue Dog Democrat