I am taking my 91-year old Aunt Sylvia and her friend Sara out for errands. Her mind is sharp, but her hearing is not so hot; she’s always mixing up names. She keeps mentioning, 'that Mishuggeneh, Mr. Shmeck'. I have no idea who she's talking about.
"Sagla," says Aunt Sylvia, "Mr. Shmeck has a TV program where he talks nonsense, writes on a blackboard and cries at the drop of a hat; you remember, he had a big Megilah in Vashington; he sat on Mr. Lincoln’s lap!"
Ah! It’s beginning to ring a bell. I remember reading about a rally in Washington, but the leader was Glenn Beck of Fox television, not Mr. Shmeck; I assume it’s the same person.
"Sagla," says Aunt Sylvia, "Mr. Shmeck has a TV program where he talks nonsense, writes on a blackboard and cries at the drop of a hat; you remember, he had a big Megilah in Vashington; he sat on Mr. Lincoln’s lap!"
Ah! It’s beginning to ring a bell. I remember reading about a rally in Washington, but the leader was Glenn Beck of Fox television, not Mr. Shmeck; I assume it’s the same person.
I correct Aunt Sylvia; “his name is Glenn Beck, not Mr. Shmeck; he hosts a popular program on Fox.”
“YES, 'that’s the Mishuggeneh', I’m talking about Sagala--Mr. Shmeck of Fux. What do my fellow citizens see in that schmendrick, Mr. Shmeck," Sylvia asks? "He tells his viewers things that aren’t true; he shouldn’t do that!” “Isn’t that right, Sara?" "Of course," Sara exclaims.
“Aunt Syl," I explain, “the furcockt economy is scaring people; Americans don’t know which way is up--what or who to believe."
"Fear, shmear," yells Sylvia, “does that mean they have to listen to that drek from Mr. Shmeck? I can hardly hear, but what I hear I don’t like."
"Fear, shmear," yells Sylvia, “does that mean they have to listen to that drek from Mr. Shmeck? I can hardly hear, but what I hear I don’t like."
"Sagala, I’m not the biggest fan of Obamala, but Mr. Shmeck makes up things about him--that he hates white people--that he’s a socialist. I only wish he was a socialist, believe me. I know from socialists, and he is not one! Am I right, Sarala," asks Sylvia? "Absolutely," Sara says in solidarity with her friend.
I take Aunt Sylvia home. My parting words: “Sweetheart, take a break from Mr. Shmeck; your blood pressure will appreciate it.” “Feh”, she blurts out—“I want nothing to do with Mr. Shmeck or Mr. Beck!”
Glossary:
Yiddish English
-Schmendrick -Jerk, fool
-Farcoct -Crappy
-Drek -Shit
-Feh -Expression of disgust
-Megileh -Big deal
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